Fatties On the Airplane

Writing and thinking about this made me so upset I had to unblog here since Thanksgiving. I will try again.

Thanksgiving was OK except for the distant relative who sat next to me and one of the other larger members of the family and complained about the 'fatties' on the plane. She complained how "they smell and sweat on you and how it isn't fair". She obviously has some weightism issues. I know a specific person, fat or otherwise can have specific, albeit annoying traits, especially on an airplane but that should not mean all fat people should be under that same umbrella. I find it particularly disturbing that anyone would vent their weightist feeling sitting next to two plus size women unless at least a slight put down was intended. That makes me upset and of course reminds me again why I tend to keep away from large gatherings.

Often people explain that it is OK to be mean to fat people because they are obviously inferior. They obviously have no sense self control or health. They deserve to be treated harshly and with disrespect. If you dislike someone for legitimate (interactions, behavior) personal reasons.....and they are also fat, fat becomes the descriptor that excuses their feelings.
One acquaintance was telling me about how she hated when her MIL came to visit because she didn't help with the kids, made her house messy and didn't say nice things...all legitimate, real, reasons. Then she explains that she is also a sloppy fat person.

.....Oh.......

Ok.... How horrible that a fat person has to visit you.
It is irrelevant that she is slim and attractive or that one of her relatives lives in the house, helps with the kids and is fat. I just can't believe this progressive, educated woman went THERE for an insult....while on the phone with a fat person!

I know that I am not as articulate or well researched enough that I can go into all the social, cultural, historical and emotional ramifications of the treatment of people based on their body weight. There is the Fat Acceptance movement and the Heath at Every Size community for more information on that end. 

Health at every size http://www.haescommunity.org/

http://www.naafaonline.com National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance (NAAFA) 

Weightism study article on ABC Online

I guess my final thoughts here is that it shouldn't be OK to group people together based on things and be cruel or mean to ALL of them because of that. 

It could be race, gender, nationality.......sexual orientation, age, language, religion or lack thereof...... immigration status, educational level, employment sector.....amount of tattoos, cleanliness of clothing, style of clothes,  marriage or parenthood status, pregnancy, sports fan, neighborhood, level of power or status according to socio-economic grade... I'm sure you get the idea.

In the two examples I talked about the non-fat person was complaining about another person who had made them unhappy because of things they did or didn't do in their interpersonal relationship. Their FAT did nothing to those people. What those people did was put me in a situation where I felt empathy for them until the fatphobia came out and I was part of their problem suddenly.  

So when it it OK to be mean to people? What do you think? 

My thighs might send you a mean e-mail calling you a selfish person. Damn that fat.